The Betty Years

I finally finished The Four Agreements and at the end of the book there's a beautiful prayer. And there's a story about a man whose light shines all out of his head. And when asked how that light shines he told of how he gave love to everyone.
I left for work after reading that all warm and fuzzy inside. I set out to give love to everyone. I started off good and then it went down hill. God why is it so hard to love people unconditionally. It seemed everyone wanted to be defiant or have an attitude while I looked at people with a smile saying "here, let me love you". I know this is something God is working on me about loving unconditionally. That no matter where I'm at letting my light shine regardless of how the other person is treating me.
And so on to the title of my post, I just turned 31 recently and my Mom had me while she was in her 30s. My mother was the most selfless caring woman I have ever known. I can't ask her how she did it because she is no longer with us but I know I would love to live my life like her. If I could just love whole heartedly not keeping score. If I could just take care of my child with so much love and care. If I could never turn my back on family or a friend in need, I could be like Betty Sue. And so I'm naming my 30's the Betty Years. I'm going to keep on trying never giving up until I can spread my light everywhere I go.

Dont take it personal, take the bitter with the sweet.

Leave it to my 3 year old to teach me a lesson in not taking anything personally. I have been reading the four agreements and while its taking me dang near a month to complete it the one agreement that has stuck out to me is don't take anything personal. So that's what I challenged myself to do today. I went to work and wrote "Dont Take Anything Personally" with a little heart next to it and then I made it through my work day.
My friend asked me to go out so I waited until after 730 when she got off and tried to find a cool place me and Noah could go. We have never been bowling before so I thought we could go there....Wrong!!! Bowling is the worst place to take a 3 year old. He wanted to steal everyone's balls and run out into the bowling lane and let's not forget how he tried to kick the ball when I turned my head for four seconds and busted his lip on the ball. I just wanted to leave, never mind the fact that my friend didn't help at all. So I got him together and still the melt downs continued. I was mortified. As I sat in the car after getting my child to be quiet with a bag of mnms a ton of things went through my mind. In Celebrate Recovery we joke that I am suffering from motherism.  I also thought about how I really need to get my self together and focus on me and Noah. It's ok to not have friends during this time God will see us through.  And lastly my child is not the first 3 year old to have a melt down and he won't be the last. I just need to breathe and know I'm doing the best that I can and that's all that matters.

Hey guys! Long time no speak. I have been saving up for a car since January and it seems like so much has been popping up to stop me from saving so I got the bright idea to create a crowd funding account to see if I could get any results. All donations are welcome :)
http://www.gofundme.com/b8l3ok

Easter fun!

I think I have had 2 off days in the last 3 weeks and Im not complaining at all. I was super emo for a minute thinking I was going to miss my babys first Easter being that I worked Saturday and Sunday. In a last minute miracle my manager gave me Saturday off so I was able to attend Noahs first Easter egg hunt.

Im so thankful for so many things and the main thing is LOVE. My Father God loving me so much that he sent his only Son to die on the cross for my sins. I am thankful for my boo Jesus who loves me so much that He willingly came to earth to complete this task and He rose again. I am thankful that I get to know true love through my very on son and I am so thankful for my family, my village who helps me raise this little boy and make sure that his life overflows with love.